Lithium Phosphate? That'll make an absolute MONSTER of a battery!
Greetings, Power lovers! I'm your host, the Baron, and it's time once more to visit the horror of...
Welcome, horrororrs and horrororrettes, to the scariest sale in the Southwest! I'm the Baron, and I'm your host for however long it takes you to read this entire page. Today we're taking a look at the PowerMax Jump Starter. You'll note that it uses Lithium Iron Phosphate instead of Lithium Ion. What does that mean for you? Let's find out... USING THE CLASSIC MONSTERS OF THE POSTWAR ERA!!!!
Every giant lizard should know that Lithium Iron Phosphate is more stable chemically and thermally, especially when compared with a nuclear power plant or Lithium Ion battery. Lithium Iron Phosphate offers less thermal overrun, and it's not at all radioactive. Giant lizards will get that supercharge they need without the risk of burning their delicate scale-covered claws. ADVANTAGE: POWERMAX JUMP STARTER
Being a giant desert ant soldier is hungry work! But a giant desert ant soldier has enough work trying to violate the laws of physics and keep itself from collapsing. It's got no time to be unsafe! That's why, when compared to a power plant (or a Lithium Ion battery) Lithium Iron Phosphate is the way to go. Especially when charging your car, or filling up before you drag Nevada's power grid back to the nest for your beloved queen.
Ask any alien! They'll tell you that their super-advanced science knows a spacefaring race needs a Lithium Iron Phosphate battery more than it needs all of a planet's women. Women make terrible spaceship chargers! Whereas the PowerMax Lithium Iron Phosphate Auto Jump Starter can jump start almost any battery you'll run into as you cross the parking lots of the universe.
See, horrororrs and horrororrettes? Anything can be explained with the help of B-movie characters! Until next time.... BE AFRAID!! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! /lightning noise