We're Proslatizing! That's a pun, not a typo. Please don't write in.
Proselytizing is when you're really into something and you try to win others over to your cause. Proslatizing is the same thing, but with Proslat items! Yeah! Have we won you over yet?
Oh, huh. Guess we expected this would be a little easier. Okay, well, we can put more effort into it, then. Like, um... oh! Do you know how Proslat can let you clean up your garage or storage space! Everybody loves a clean garage or storage space! Yeah! Let's Proslat!
Oh, some of you still aren't won over yet. Um... okay, well, maybe we should focus on the ones who are. So, everybody who loves Proslat out there, you should buy today's product, and then write down ten different ways you can convince someone who hates Proslat- wait, is hate to strong a word? It's too strong a word, isn't it? Write down ten different ways you can convince someone indifferent to Proslat to come around to our way of thinking. Then you can be a Proslatizer just like us!
Oh, you'll also need to go to a special Proslatizing school and get your Proslatizing degree. That'll cost you an extra twenty grand a year. And that's before we include dorm fees and the meal plan. Oh, and there's no parking on campus. But how else will you learn how to properly Proslatize?