On a clear night, you can view all 360 degrees of the fire from miles away!
GUY RUNS IN, OUT OF BREATH.
"I saw the fire and got here as quickly as I could! How long do you think?"
How long for what?
"Until the Redcoats arrive!"
Oh, they actually called and said they weren't coming.
Yeah, something about their babysitter flaking out. Kind of a bummer. They were bringing the marshmallows.
"What a relief! I'll alert the militia to stand down."
It's cool. I texted everyone already.
"And what is our strategy should they decide to come anyway?"
Then we'll get S'mores!
"Good idea! I'll inquire as to the number of able-bodied men in outlying areas."
Between you and me, I think the real reason they ditched is that they got a new boat.
"A boat! Why didn't you say so?! We're gonna need another fire pit!"