Spread some rain down on your Kilamanjaros.

Let's be honest: if you were in a band, what would be THE most punk rock thing you could possibly have your name on? That's right. A bidet.

Oh, sure, lots of people have guitars or basses or keyboards or drums with their signature on the top of it. That's just a sign you've made it as a musician, and it's sure a great way to supplement your income. But a bidet? Your band's name on a bidet? That's sending a messing. That's saying "Hey, we don't care what you say about us, because we do what we want."

Not to mention, what about all those bands who put their name on things people love to talk about? You've just satirized them brilliantly! You could carry your bidet onto a TV show and plug it non-stop! Kids would laugh! Adults would cringe! (Except for the cool ones, of course.) And guess what else: you'd make some real money! Because a quality bidet is an actually useful product, while also being kinda funny! It's GENIUS! No different than the work of Marcel Duchamp!

So keep this in mind, if your punk band ever wants to do endorsements. Maybe it would be a good idea to consider a bidet deal.

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